A Journey Through Space-Time
Battling Writer's Block with a Childhood Book
Notes on our Childhood Books
Waiting my turn on Zoom, I glanced through my poem and winced. I'd struggled to write it, and it seemed uniformly terrible. Of course, I knew my critique group would deliver their evaluation with kindness, but I felt frustrated.
After all, I'd been battling writer's block all month, spending hours trying to channel my ideas into words with little success. My anxiety was growing. Why am I so stuck? I wondered.
At that moment, one of our members had a connectivity glitch, and her image and sentences began to phase in and out of the discussion. Another one of our group, Katie, asked, "Do you think she's caught in a tesseract?"
The question pulled me out of my self-critical spiral, and I laughed at the reference to Madeleine L'Engle's A Wrinkle in Time. It had been my favorite book growing up, one that I'd read over and over again.
A few minutes later, we rescheduled our meeting due to the technical issues, but I couldn't bear to turn back to my writing, not even to my poem that clearly needed revision.
Remembering Katie's tesseract joke, I thought: why not read A Wrinkle in Time again?
I went upstairs, pulled it from my son's bookshelf, and slid into the story. Once again, I delighted in Meg Murry and her three female guides, full of wisdom and brimming with humor and magic. Once again, I contemplated the book's central concept—the tesseract, the tool for navigating space-time into glorious adventure.
***
Most people have a favorite children's book or young adult novel from their past—likely one with a riveting plot, but also much more. The most popular books, the ones that have stood the test of time, feature characters with whom we identify and empathize deeply. Back then, I felt relieved and reassured as I read about the teenage Meg Murry, who felt as out of place and confused as I did.
Importantly, those books also introduce kids to the universal themes of the human journey. Indeed, it's a mistake to assume that children's literature is childish in nature. During an On Being interview so heartfelt that it made me tear up multiple times, children's author Kate DiCamillo noted the rich emotional depth of children and their ability to comprehend life's hardship and pain.
According to DiCamillo, children’s authors have a sacred mission: to tell them the truths of life in a way that shows them that they can bear those truths.
Thinking back on my favorite books, I know that the authors fulfilled that mission—E.B. White's Charlotte explaining the cycles of life to Wilbur; Natalie Babbitt's Winnie grasping the inevitability, and necessity, of death; L.M. Montgomery's Anne longing to belong to a family.
Loneliness, fear, disconnection, injustice: children's authors skillfully convey such rich and complicated concepts as well as their beautiful opposites—acceptance, peace, forgiveness, and especially love. They do so with profound consciousness of and sensitivity toward the young people reading their words.
As I read A Wrinkle in Time again, I thought of the emotional depth and resonance of L'Engle's story. Meg endures life's cruelties, large and small, digs deep to find the strength to face her fears, and comes to recognize the abundance of love around her.
Reaching the end of the book, I felt a flash of understanding: this is why I write. Like Meg, I, too, am attempting to face the larger forces bearing down on us all by acting in my own small way, in my limited capacity, as well as I can. I, too, want to witness, to understand, to speak out with as much love as I can muster.
What a privilege it is to do this work, I thought.
And my writer's block? I'd like to say it evaporated when I finished my nostalgic read, but I admit that I'm still phasing in and out of a state of flow. (Perhaps I'm mid-tesseract, too?) However, that block now seems less like a concrete monolith and more like an expanse of clay soil. I feel it loosening, softening, letting water and air move through it.
I am breathing into those opening spaces, trusting that the words will return.
Recommendations:
Interview. If you're interested in Kate DiCamillo's lovely and openhearted On Being interview, mentioned above, click here.
Writing Prompt: While you were growing up, what were your favorite children's books and young adult novels? Journal about the messages you gleaned from them, their impact on your own development, and, if applicable, why you chose to keep one or more of them in your own home years later. If you're willing, I'd love to hear your reflections!
Book List. If you want to jog your memory about the books you once loved, this is Time's list of the most popular and enduring young adult books.
Notes on the Writing Path
More on Writer's Block. Sometimes, resolving writer's block isn't as easy as changing routines, setting up schedules, or even reading a book from childhood. This article, recommended by a member of my critique group (thank you, Katie!), addresses the more complicated questions that may underlie unexpected pauses in our writing.
Proprioceptive Journaling. As I ask myself those questions, I'm using a journaling method recommended by writing coach Ann Kroeker, a technique known to be effective in exploring more complex issues and beliefs. Its accompanying ritual involves a candle, a particular musical beat, unlined paper, and one specific question: "what do I mean by?" If you'd like to learn more, have a look at Writing the Mind Alive: The Proprioceptive Method for Finding your Authentic Voice.
I appreciate your interest! If you'd like to read more of my work, some of it is featured on my website: DheepaRMaturi.com.
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-Dheepa
A Wrinkle In Time is my most favorite book in the whole world. I still have my copy from the third grade. I still remember what it felt like to read it for the first time, filled with wonder and curiosity and so many good lines.
“A book, too, can be a star, “explosive material, capable of stirring up fresh life endlessly,” a living fire to lighten the darkness, leading out into the expanding universe.”
My little third grade mind was just blown wide open with that book. Maybe it's time to read it again.
Thank you for these lovely words and the reminder of the magic of writing. <3
So well expressed, Dheepa!